April you could not be more stressful I have to say!
April was a bit upset and stressful month and I felt so low mentally for a good few weeks. I was no able to figure out how to make this post a happy one like I usually do. But why should it be another perfect and beautiful story, if I really struggled a lot those last few weeks… so let’s make it REAL instead!
This week is Mental Awareness Week 2021, so I want to join the fight for mental health and support everyone experiencing hard times, especially now during this global pandemic. I want to remind you that we all can feel depressed, stressed and overwhelmed and that’s OK. So many of us experience bad times and struggles in our lives right now. But let’s don’t forget we are only humans and we are allowed to feel our feelings and ask for support when we need it!
My April struggles
So as I said, let’s make it real…
My work is so depressing, I’m under continuous stress that made me gained a bit of weight and left me unhappy in my body again. I felt a bit lost in my intuitive eating journey and I even tried to jump onto the diet wagon, which made me feel even more overwhelmed and anxious. I am so against diets after dieting for most of my adult life, so trying another one made me actually feel really restricted again. My body is crazy, I can gain so much weight from stress, but losing it never came easy to me.
April was my birthday month. I am officially 35 now and I was freaking out (a bit) that I’m getting old. I know sound silly, but I wish I could stay in my early thirties forever …and yes seeing grey hair is not fun at all.
I’ve been also missing my family and going abroad is still against the law in the UK (till 17th May at least). My little baby niece is 3 months old and I haven’t seen her yet. My heart is melting when my sister sending me photos and video of her, but I wish I could hug and kiss her in person instead. She is so sweet and gorgeous. Norway, you better open your boards sometime soon as I cannot wait to book my flight!
And on top of that my grandma had been in a hospital with a broken hip and Covid. We’ve been told that she was positive and she had to isolate in hospital, but she did not experience any symptoms at all thank God. She is getting better now which makes me so happy. My grandma means so much to me and I cannot wait to see her again.
But hey… let’s look for some positivity in April too.
And a bit of happiness
But there were also so many happy things that had happened in April and it feels good to be able to remind myself about these too. Looking for small things in life that bring us joy is so important. If not for those little enjoyments our life would be so miserable.
Six things that brought me joy in April are:
- opening of non-essential shops – I never thought I would be so pleased to be finally able to go clothes and accessories shopping. I missed TKmaxx the most and I have spent a bit of money when they reopened it again on the 12th of April. Because why not! I did have a huge shopping spree in Yorkshire too. Got lots of great bits and outfits, especially from Zara. Ohh I really missed shopping trips.
- beautiful cherry blossoms, which I am actually intolerant to as well – Every year I am looking forward to April not only because it’s my birthday month but also because I love those beautiful pink and white flower trees. Anyway, who doesn’t love spring and cherry blossoms?! A big dream on my bucket list is to visit Japan in spring!
- original Japanese matcha tea set – Nath got me this beautiful matcha tea set from Moya Matcha for my birthday and I’ve been using it each morning since. I love my morning matcha now. If you asked me a couple of weeks ago how I am going to live without coffee I would say it’s impossible. But of course is possible! …and yes, coffee was on my intolerance list too! Taking coffee on the go every morning was my ritual, but now I’ve changed it to coconut milk matcha latte. I’ve been enjoying it each morning on my commute to work.
- gluten-free Norwegian waffles for my birthday breakfast – on the morning of my birthday we went to this yummy Scandinavian cafe in Harrogate called Baltzersen’s, where I enjoyed Norwegian waffles in the rain. Yes, the weather wasn’t great on that day and you can only eat outside at the moment, but it was fun anyway. We bought coffee beans and sourdough bread from their bakery too. Something we always do when we there.
- our first train trip this year – We went to Yorkshire for my birthday. We visited York, Harrogate and Leeds and this trip was so needed. Even we went for 3 nights only, we still had a great and relaxing time. Yorkshire in spring is simply beautiful! I would like to know if you have visited Yorkshire and if so, what’s your favourite part of it?
- finding out my intolerances – Just before Easter, I’ve decided to send my hair to Intolerance Lab to find out what I am really intolerant to and the results were so unexpected. It totally shocked me to find out that I’m intolerant to so many of my favourite products. For me, this is a positive thing, that I finally found the courage to do the test. I’m going to write a separate post on this topic, as my list is really long. But I know reducing those products is going to help my body and skin regenerate and improve.
A little summary
So as you see not everything in this post is positive and happy. But I want to keep it real… and remind myself that it’s ok not to be ok sometimes! …and yes I was crying while typing this post… I cried a lot in April. But life is not always bright and beautiful for us and sometimes we simply have to embrace all obstacles.
I’ve decided to keep this post short and just share with you the sad and happy moments of April. I have not managed to finish any book in April or achieve the goals I set for myself neither. Each month may be different from another. Sometimes we are extremely productive and sometimes we just want to do nothing and relax. But that’s also ok!
And now to a bit more positive and happy last few weeks of May! Hope it’s gonna be a good one for us all!
Love, Monika xx